What am I doing?

...on my first night free and alone for a while?
Sitting around at the computer, dicking around, having a couple drinks.
Fucking pathetic.

(Oh, on a side note, I swear to god I'm going to buy this figurine one of these days. )

I could be doing anything.
Anything in the world.
I could be using my time productively!
I'm not.
I'm blogging.

I had all these big plans for this evening. I was going to go to the bank, go to the store, make a bad-ass dinner, read a book (for once not on my lunch break at work), maybe meet up with a friend later on and go to the burlesque show she's been trying to get me out to for months.

Instead, I'm here.

First, I got lazy and didn't go to the bank. Then, my roommate said he wanted to hang out and, as I feel like I've been ignoring him lately, I decided that was a good idea. Turns out though that his job blows donkeys and keeps him late. Now, I had been holding off on making dinner until he got back so now, I've got 2 glasses of wine in me, no dinner soon in sight and a night spent sitting in front of a glowing screen. Because of course I didn't read. That would require focus that I frankly don't have.

I have to pee.

Perception: (noun) Something I don't have.

Anyone who tells you that they're good at reading people is a) full of shit, b) full of themselves, c) creepy, d) a prime candidate to give me lessons, because I fucking can't read anyone.

I'm so sick of bouncing thoughts around in my head, trying to guess what someone else is thinking because I'm too chicken to actually come out and ask. All I can do is presume what someone thinks of me, a presumption that seems to change by the hour in the hyperactive annals of my underworked, overactive imagination.

I'm retarded.

A good week.

Whaaat? It was!

OK, maybe there might have been an inordinate amount of bitching about work and my neck and money and such things. And fellow employees who don't show up and printers trying to shake themselves to pieces. And apartment searches and rampant emotions and the sun.

But aside from those things, good week.

I mean, there was Labor Day which meant no labor. Sweet. I got a parking pass for the Galleria, so anyone who wants to go can go hang out at the Galleria with me for over 2 hours and not have to worry about whether validation will cover it. Then again, finding reasons to spend that long there may be a bigger problem. Hmm... I made a bad ass quesadilla! That was neat. Super proud of that. Got a friend hooked on Brownie Batter ice cream, which makes me giggle. Saw a couple NoHo shows (hooray for local artists!). Made some headway on my Ophelia stuff and confronted my fear of singing in front of people yet again (I hate doing that). And plus, there was fun time spent hanging about and quoting with an individual whom I fancy. Well done there. I like, is niiice.

Now comes tomorrow: day of getting stuff done!
Finding apartments!
Going to rehearsals!
Taking publicity shots!
And... trivia games? OK, that'll be fun.
I hope.

... That was only 2 fucking days???

ARE YOU KIDDING ME????

That was the longest 2 goddamn days that I've had in a long while!
In all honesty, if I had to guess, I would say it had to be at least 4. Which is odd, since I slept until mid-afternoon yesterday.

Where is my time going?
However, I had a bad-ass rehearsal today and love my Hamlet cast more today than yesterday. It's going to be fantastically fun and eventually... *sigh* I'll have to start harrassing people about me new show. OK, fine, I already have started this evening.

New revelation: I don't have to be wasted to act like an 8 year old!
(Well, I was mildly intoxicated but despite my better efforts, not drunk.)
I had a fantastic evening chasing my friends (yes, real live friends) around with water-balloons and squirt-guns and, in all honesty, I had a fucking blast. I don't remember the last time I had a serious water fight, but it was probably somewhere around 4th grade. Or senior year of high school. Or college if you count the snow fight... you know, never mind!
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Ugh.
Never get interested in a person with a blog.
I reiterate.
It will only give you too much information and fill you with self-doubt.
Fuck.